I am probably your average high school junior. Junior year in America is notorious for stress on stress on stress on stress. For the last year or so, I have been perpetually inundated with new stresses and as a result, new emotions.
After an especially emotionally draining day at school, I came home and sank into my favorite corner of my slightly retro velvet couch. There, I poured my emotions, feelings, and thoughts into a new bullet in the the longest note in my most used app: Google Keep.
This has become a routine for me. Ever since I started high school three years ago, I’ve gotten into the habit of writing everything down—and by everything, I mean everything. (Click here for what I write down in my Google Keep).
Recently, my lists of emotions and revelations have been screaming at me. The list is now so long it forces me to go back, read, and reflect. Upon reflection, I decided that some of the topics on the list needed to be further explored. I started writing blog post-like drafts about some of my thoughts. I even loosely researched some of the emotions and experiences I had been through. These searches led me to blog after blog of people just like me who expressed their thoughts publicly through their own blogs.
This is when it hit me. I should start a blog. That’s basically how it started—I had ideas and wanted to share my thoughts, and I started a blog.
As a high school student, school work is heavy and extracurricular activities drain me daily. Despite my hectic schedule, I write and I blog because I love it. I love expressing my thoughts and articulating them. Even though it has only been a month since the birth of Always Present, I have learned a lot; here are some key points:
- I’ve learned about myself. This sounds obvious, but I really have learned a lot about my personality and interests. I’ve found that I love simplicity and that I actually think website design is super cool. While I haven’t had time to explore the depths of hardcore graphic design, I’ve bookmarked other people’s blogs that I love and hope to develop my blog like. I’ve also learned that writing releases so much emotional tension and that no matter how busy I am, I can always find time to write, or at least think about what to write.
- I’ve learned a lot about the world. A couple weeks ago, some friends were asking me why I started this blog and what I’ve learned. My response was that I wanted to make a personal blog mainly to remember my experiences and increase my writing experiences and that I learned that many of the world’s issues do not have an answer. Through writing blog posts and delving deep into my surface level daily thoughts on the world, I’ve simultaneously gained understanding of the world and discovered more unanswered questions. The world is not black and white, it is all shades of gray; debates are not concisely answered and issues are not resolved easily. While frustrating, the world is the way it is for a reason and it’s beautiful for that same reason.
- I’ve learned about writing and started to develop a style and voice. Starting this blog has taught me a lot about my literary identity in such a short amount of time. When I first started this blog a little more than a month ago, I was very insecure about the quality of my writing. I worried about every sentence and every chosen word. I used to go back and revise obsessively. While quality is still very important to me and I’m still an amateur writer/blogger, I’ve found that free writing and then going back and editing is more beneficial for me than obsessing over finding the perfect word all the time. My voice, I believe, has become more relaxed and as a result, more genuine as I became more confident in my writing and in my ideas. I’ve also expanded but also honed in on more topics that I care about. I can see my blog developing more and more into what I had envisioned for this platform every time I edit.
My blog is still very very young and I still have a lot of life left to live. I have so much ahead of me and I can’t wait to share more of my experiences and grow more with this blog. I will continue developing this platform as long as I keep thinking and experiencing. I hope to continue to find topics to write about and to continue to be always present.
Thanks for reading!! 🙂